How to Talk to Your Hair Stylist: Getting Exactly What You Want Every Time

By Janelle Alexis | Hair Tips

As a stylist, one of the most challenging parts of my job isn’t the technical work — it’s the communication. Not because my clients are difficult, but because most people have never been taught how to effectively communicate about something as personal as their hair. Today I’m writing this from behind the chair, giving you the stylist’s-eye-view on how to have a better appointment every time.

Bring Photos — And Bring Multiple

The most common miscommunication I see happens when a client says “I want something like… Jennifer Lopez in that one video” and I’m working entirely on my mental image of what that might mean. Photos eliminate ambiguity. Bring photos of what you DO want. Also bring photos of what you don’t want — knowing what to avoid is just as valuable as knowing the target.

When you bring photos, point out specifically what you like. Is it the color? The length? The texture? The way it falls? Be specific. “I love the warm caramel tones at the mid-shaft” tells me something. “I love it” tells me almost nothing.

Be Honest About Your Maintenance Commitment

Please, for the love of good hair, be honest with your stylist about how much time you actually spend on your hair each morning. I have had clients who swear they’re low-maintenance ask for a style that genuinely requires 45 minutes of daily upkeep. When I push back gently, they insist they’ll do it — and six weeks later they come back with the style grown out and untended because life happened.

There is no shame in being a low-maintenance client. I actually love helping low-maintenance clients because it’s a design challenge: how do we get you looking your most beautiful with minimal effort? That’s a fun problem to solve. But I need you to tell me the truth so I can solve the right problem.

Speak Up During the Appointment

If something feels wrong during your service — if the color is pulling too warm, if the cut is going shorter than you expected, if something about the extensions doesn’t feel right — say something in the moment. Do not wait until after I’ve finished to tell me you’re unhappy. I cannot undo a completed color service the way I can adjust a work in progress. Real-time communication is the single biggest predictor of client satisfaction.

After Your Appointment

If something isn’t right when you get home and the style is set — reach out immediately. Do not wait two weeks. Most stylists, including myself, have a policy to make adjustments within a certain timeframe after service. The sooner you communicate, the more options we have to make it right.

Communication is a two-way street. I promise to be honest with you about what your hair can realistically achieve in one visit. I need you to be honest with me about what you actually want and need. That partnership is what creates the results you see in my Instagram photos. Book an appointment or subscribe to my newsletter for more insider tips.

— Janelle Alexis